Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Randomize
