so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
