Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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