We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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