thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
