I need to stop coming to work sober
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
either way he was missing a nipple.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize