im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize