Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
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