Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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