I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Randomize