I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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