also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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