Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I touched a dick in church today
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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