Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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