I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Randomize
