i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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