she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
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Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
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Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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