party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
organizing the empties. That sober.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
