we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize
