Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
