I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
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