CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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