So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
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