you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
