I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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