He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize