I seem to have left my pride at pride
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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