I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
How external is "for external use only"?
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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