This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
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