please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
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