Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
