I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
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