I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize