chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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