is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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