im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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