Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Randomize
