It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
i came on her dog
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
