U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
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The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
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One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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