Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
