I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
