just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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