Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize