I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize