What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Is it because I queefed?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
