Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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