this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize