and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i think i have herpe
just one?
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
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Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
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In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize