Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
