i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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