My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
