White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
